Let Go..

This is exactly what S said a while back. Few days ago S  went to attend a training and got a very nice pen from there. I  took it away from him on the same day and have been sparingly using it so that it lasts long. Today I went to the scanning/photocopier room in my office and left the pen somewhere. I  realized it quite late and started searching high and low for it but it was gone!! I asked all the security guards if some good samaritan found it and gave it to them. I checked under the table, near shredder but it was nowhere to be found.

Its been 3 hours and I am still stuck at the thought of that pen! The whole chain of events are going on in an endless loop. I have asked S atleast a hundred times if he can attend one more training and get the same pen for me! He is a patient man for sure, to put up with a crazy person with weird OCD’s  is a very big task for sure. And this guy doesn’t even flinch.

I have a big issue with losing things.I just cannot  tolerate and find it extremely difficult to  overcome  that nagging feeling. When I was a  kid, one of   my cousins stole my parker pen.  Since  I am very careful about my things I can make out if its lost very soon. So this cousin took the pen and went home. I told my parents, they asked me to leave it and not make an issue and they promised to buy me a new one. But I just couldn’t control my anger and frustration. I went to their house on the same day, threatened my cousin to give it back or I will inform his parents and finally got it back.

S and I are friends for almost a decade and he very well knows about my OCD of losing things. Today, I asked him what would he have done if he was in my place, he immediately said “Let Go”! I can’t even imagine doing that. Infact, he has now asked me to precisely do that , “Let Go”. I have promised him I won’t bug the security guards again tomorrow and neither would I sulk or ask him one more time to bring it from office. He says its a challenge for me and that this attitude would prepare me for bigger things in life.


As of now, I am hoping the thought of that cute fluorescent green and royal blue pen somehow dissipates. I don’t want to think about this in my dreams and spoil my beauty sleep. (Oh ya btw, I dream about the objects I lose!!)



Well, I normally restrain myself from talking about caste. Since I come from Nagpur (land of Deekshabhoomi)  I have been extremely careful about the whole caste issue. Then why this sudden outburst?

I am sure most of you must have read about the Dalit Student Committing suicide episode. It has become a rage for the past two days and the politicians are leaving no stones unturned to make this a mass issue and the opposition is trying all their might to use this in their favor! Well, I have full sympathy towards this guy’s family,again not with the boy but what is the use of making this a political issue! Everyone is blaming BJP and sympathizing towards the whole Dalit community. But noone has really bothered to check what really happened. By noone, I mean the media especially. This guy along with a group of guys apparently made a protest when Yakub Memom was hanged. I am a firm believer  freedom of speech so accordingly to me voicing your opinion in social media or blog or any personal space about whether Yakub was good or not is never a problem. But doing it in public is against Indian laws. These guys did that and they got reprimanded for the same!! Now where did, Dalit or caste come in picture? I am sure the result would have been the same had it been a Brahmin, Kshatriya and what not!

I remember when I was in college, my hostel warden had sent a letter calling my parents when our girls gang stayed up late and danced through the night! It was simply about breaking the rule!! We were a group of girls belonging to different caste, different cities and different communities. Infact, the  punishment that these guys got did not stop them from attending classes, they were only barred from hostels. Haven’t we all heard of cases of people getting expelled from college/hostel etc for breaking rules? Then why this hue and cry suddenly?

There was mad traffic jam in Hyd today because apparently Rahul Gandhi came to Hyderabad? I seriously wonder what did he have to do in this whole issue? Wait, did feel like eating Biryani and decided to come here giving this as an excuse? Or does he also wants this to use this for his next elections. In short, everyone is blaming Modi and BJP because somewhere inside a small room in University of Hyderabad one guy committed suicide because he could not face and fight with the world! Wah rey India, Jiyo!!

Anyways, the whole purpose of this post was to vent out my frustrations against the whole caste system in India. I know the so called upper class people inflicted a lot of pain to Dalits back in early days but din’t Dr Ambedkar worked on getting them sorted? I am sure things have changed a lot since then. Infact, its time the whole caste system is abolished. Reservations should strictly be based on financial condition and not on caste! I personally know so many of my friends who are doing so well in life and yes they do not belong to the “Open” category!  Shouldn’t the educated people refrain from seeking added advantages in the same of caste and instead make those facilities available for poor people?

I am sure this post might irk a lot of people but trust me I have nothing against any caste. I just have a problem with this whole bloody system! If anyone needs special care its the poor people who cannot afford many privileges and not the so called ‘lower caste people’ roaming around in Mercedes and BMWs.

Before I sign off, suicide is not the solution to any problem. If it was then half the population of this world would have died. There are so many people going through bigger and much worse issues in life! If you commit suicide for just being from hostel, then sorry, you don’t have my sympathy!



I am alive..

..And kicking!!

We have moved back to Hyderabad (hopefully, for good). I have always been a big fan of Hyd. I remember admiring the beauty of Hussain Sagar Lake and Necklace Road when I visited the city of Nizams back in 2003. I came here to write my law entrance exams at NALSAR Hyderabad. Well, don’t ask me how did I end up in an IT company then. That’s the big story!!


I was again here in 2010. S and I had an amazing time and those days will always remain special. We had an amazing set of friends and endless discussions, playing pictionary etc was a routine. Fast forward 2016, the city has changed a lot, so have the people!! There is so much traffic! Friends have moved on in life.. But I still share the same love for the city.

Ever since we moved here, life has been very hectic. I was working from home for the past 4 years and suddenly going back to office feels so different. 24 hrs seem less. Work is challenging and I am the only girl in the team.  I am doing a good job and my manager is very happy with me. Infact, he wants me to lead the offshore team soon.

I love the apartment we love in. Its a gated community with all amenities. Back in Delhi we could not have afforded such a plush apartment. I feel so grateful to be living here.

So how are you all doing





Life in bullets.

I know I have been MIA for a long time. When I wrote the previous post I was seriously hoping to revive the almost dead blog but life has never been predictable for me. Whenever I decide to do something or plan ahead something happens so much so that I dread planning this much in advance these days. A lot has happened over the past few months.

  • We celebrated my in-laws 60th birthday “Shastiapthapoorthi” in Jan. Whoever has experienced Delhi winters would know how hard it is to host a function in January winters. We had relatives from Chennai and Mumbai who are used to wearing sweaters when its 20 degree Celsius. Imagine calling them to Delhi in Jan! Nevertheless, the function went on really well. Thankfully we have rented a huge house. We could accommodate everyone with ease.
  • I went to my hometown within the next few weeks to ttend my sister’s baby shower. She is blessed with a beautiful daughter and the lil one is the apple of everyone’s eyes.
  • Sometime during the function I felt a bit dizzy and although I came back to Delhi next day I started worrying too much about my dizziness. It started to get worse and I started feeling as if I was walking on the clouds. It was a very dreadful few months. I went from one Dr to another only to be given a clean chit. The orthopedic tried convincing me that I am suffering from anxiety and nothing else. But my mind refused to believe. I wasn’t making it up afterall. The symptoms whatsoever were so real!!
  • In the middle of all this S had to travel to the US. He left sometime in the middle of March and I was at the worst phase of my whatever problem that was!
  • I was so scared thinking I had some worst kind of illness and I was missing S. And I burst out in front of my father-in-law. He was so not expecting this and did not know how to react. He immediately made me book tickets to the US and convinced me that change of place will do good to me.
  • I was panicking at the thought of flying alone and that too a 13hr long direct flight. Someone I know old me about a homeopathic remedy. Although I was hesitant I took it just before the flight and I felt really calm and relaxed.
  • I continued that for the next few days and the dizziness magically disappeared. How thankful I am to that noble soul who told me about the remedy! I am trying to work through a few more  issues and if I see results I am going to take that up seriously. Placebo or not. To me if it works, thats what matters!
  • We had a lot of fun this time in USA. We went to Philly, Baltimore, Washington DC Cherry Blossom festival, Atlantic City, Niagra Falls and few nearby places.
  • We barbecued on the lakeside , went on long drives. It was a very good trip overall.
  • I came back to Delhi last week. But I had some small health issue and had to be hospitalized. I am so glad it happened after I landed here. I can’t even imagine something like that happening while on the flight and for that matter in US. Somehow I wasn’t too happy about the whole healthcare system in US but that calls for another post.
  • I am glad to be back home and I am recovering slowly.
  • I hope to get back to writing and reading more.

How have you all been? I haven’t read anything for a long time. Am I missing some big news? Chalo batao!

Happy weekend!!


Just Read..

Anne of Green Gables – L.M. Montgomery

I know much has been written and talked about Anne Shirley, the protagonist of this book. Infact, I found so many people talk about it that I immediately got myself a copy in kindle. When I started reading, S was shocked that I am actually reading a children’s classic at this age. I brushed him off saying, ” There is no age to read classics”😛


Coming to the book, frankly I was not very impressed with the fiery and talkative red-head Anne initially. But as the story progressed I began to like her. Her positivity and her perspective really excited me. I read this book at a time when I was going to a big negativity patch. When I started looking at the things in Anne way, it really made so much of a difference in my mood. One more thing that really impressed me was how progressive the characters in the book are despite the fact that this was written more than 100 years ago. Women travelling miles to watch  political tours, discussing about voting etc. Every character in the book grows beautifully. The changes Anne brings into Marilla’s behaviour and vice-versa, the love that Matthew has for Anne, everything in the book progesses beautifully.

All in all it is certainly a good read and I would have enjoyed it much more had I read this when I was say 12-13 yrs maybe, when I had imaginations as flowery as Anne’s.

Intermission – Nirupama Subramanian

I picked this book at a throwaway price just by seeing the name. A fellow Tamilian bonding😛

Gayathri and Varun are married for good 17 years and are  NRI couple settled in Gurgaon. They also happen to be a “Two States” couple ( cross- community). However, there is not much detail about how they fell in love , get married etc.   They lead a very boring life in the millennium city. Gayathri is the CFO of some company and Varun has his own software firm.

Image from Goodreads

The book is about their life in luxurious gated-community or the condominium, about the lavish parties big shots throw, the kitty party gossips and extra-marital affair. Its a book about confused and stale relationships. We’ve heard about 7 year itch, this one is about 17. I have lived in Gurgaon so I could relate to may things in the book . Its a quick read and I finished it in 1.5 days flat! But the book was just about ok. It was a bit too filmy for my liking. The book failed to create that magic a reader looks for in a book.

Btw, S and I went to Landmark in DLF Promenade mall last weekend an there was a 90% sale going on!! Can you believe we got 15 books for less than 450 Rs? Yes! It was a steal but the books were not very popular. I got a food fiction and few other interesting books too. Can’t wait to finish them all.

Meanwhile, if any of you read something really amazing and can recommend me then it would be great!

Happy Weekend


How and Why I quit Facebook

Atlast, the day has come, dreaded D Day. Wondering what it is? Well, I quit Facebook!! The feeling is yet to sink in completely but right now it does not feel as bad as I though it would. I have been addicted to Facebook. My work from home job only made it worse. I tried various methods to cut down on the time I spent on Fb. I tried to stick to only 30min or 1 hour a day., I even put a plugin in Chrome which would measure the amount of time I spent in the dreaded virtual world. Despite seeing such huge hours spent doing nothing productive, I could not control my urge to refresh my timeline constantly! Sigh!

There were a few other issues which I will write in a private post. By and large, I was highly addicted to Facebook and I did not see a way out other than taking this drastic step. S was very upset with my behaviour. He wanted me to step out of the house and meet people. He felt I was making things miserable for me by comparing my life with others. We have had some big fights thanks to Facebook. All is well now and finally on the Shivatri night exactly at 12 Am I clicked on the “Deactivate” button!

I do have some withdrawal symptoms right now and I am trying to figure out ways to cope with it. Any suggestions?


Not a lady driver!

I have been hearing the term ‘ lady drivers’ for God Knows how long. Not just after I started driving, but much before that. So much so that I used think ladies are indeed bad when it comes to road sense.

India being a patriarchal society that it is, driving used to be considered a man’s forte. Things changed for better and more and more girls started to get behind the wheels. In a city like Delhi, you will find a number of ladies driving on the roads, on the highways and everywhere. Yet, I feel there is some bias from the male counterparts.

For Eg: The other day I was driving on a very busy road. The signal in one of the crossroads wasn’t working and there were many people waiting to take a U turn,  right turn etc. They were patiently waiting for the straight road ( where I was driving) traffic to ease up before taking the turn. However, when they saw me approaching the junction they started barging in. There was almost no space between my car and the car in front me yet these people wanted to squeeze in between expecting me to  stop and let them go!

Not jut this, the people who are waiting to cross the road also decide to do that conveniently when they see a lady driver approaching. How weird is that?

I can quote many such incidents. All I am trying to say is driving is an art, a neutral art. It does not matter if you are a girl or boy . Its all about the finesse, the ease, the confidence and the experience of the person driving.


I have seen many meme’s, youtube videos making fun of lady drivers. But why just us? In a tight parking spot the odds of parking is the same for both men and women so long as they are confident and experienced in doing so. Let me tell you that in my one year of driving in Delhi traffic, I have found as many men screwing up on roads as women. Anyways, there some jokes which will continue to troll however irrational they may be.

I have been thinking of writing about this for so long but the topic somehow got skipped from my mind. Yesterday, I went to pick up S from his friend’s house. Normally, I allow him to drive when he is around because its no fun driving in Delhi traffic. But last night I decided to drive myself rather than getting out and change seats in the cold. It was a long day at work for both of us so we were having some nice romantic conversation (The usual I missed you types!) to lighten thestress. I had cooked some nice dinner and was in a very nice mood.

We were almost nearing our society complex, when a white car started drifting towards mine. Immediately S shouted, “Watch out, its a lady driver”!!!

What started as a romantic conversation turned into a 15 minute lecture on….you know about what, right?